Just a Little Tumor

Biblical Basis: Romans 6:23

Possible Points: 1) As silly as it sounds for someone to not get a tumor removed people will just live their lives without Christ even though the wages of sin are death. You can use this skit to wake up people the the foolishness of not accepting Christ. 2) You can use this to talk to Christians that are not willing to ask for forgiveness for sin in their lives, because they might lose face if they were repentant. Many Christians would rather live with the “tumor” of being away form God rather than have everyone think that they are sick or not perfect. 3) Christians sometimes act like the doctor and instead of telling people where they can go to get healed they tell them where they can go to get the pain eased for a while. I can’t count the times that I have know people who wanted to witness to their friends do nothing more than invited them to church. They never took the time to share Christ or even their own testimony.

Setting/Props: Stage setting is quite simple, just a couple of chairs will do the trick. If a gurney is available, then that will be fine, but really not necessary. Throughout most of the sketch the doctor is standing. Only sitting to drive a point home.

Characters:

  • Doc (a white coat and stethoscope would be nice, but not necessary)
  • Bob (Just an average patient)

 

Bob: OK Doc give it to me straight. What is it?

Doc: Well, Bob, it’s not to good, but it’s not to bad, you see that pain you’ve been feeling is because you have a rather large cyst on your heart.

Bob: (obviously shaken up.) Large, well how large?

Doc: Well, I’d say that it’s about the size of a (acts like he’s lining up a golf shot) a small golf ball. (“watches” his shot go sailing) speaking of that I’m running late for a game, I’ll see you in about two weeks.

Bob: Two weeks! Doc, I got a tumor on my heart, what are you going to do about it?!?

Doc: Well my nurse will give you a local for the pain, that should make it stop hurting for a while, then if it hurts again come back and we’ll give you another one.

Bob: So you’re saying that this isn’t that bad, that I can just get a shot, and it will go away.

Doc: I’m sorry, did I say that it will go away, I meant that the shot would make that pain go away for a while, the tumor will still be there.

Bob: So I don’t have to worry about the tumor, just the pain?

Doc: (obviously annoyed that he is still here lines up another golf shot) no, the tumor can kill you if it stays there.

Bob: Well, can’t you take it out!?!

Doc: Of course I can take it out, but I don’t think that you really want that, I mean it takes so long, and I’d have to cut into your chest, and your stay in the hospital would definitely disrupt your lifestyle. No, I’ll just keep giving you locals to keep out the pain; you won’t know the difference.

Bob: Won’t know the difference, I have a tumor on my heart that is going to kill me and you’re saying that I won’t know the difference, I’ll be dead!!

Doc: Don’t worry, it could be years before it kills you, besides, tumors are relative, they effect people in different ways.

Bob: What do you mean different ways

Doc: Well this is just a little one. I’m sure that no one will even know you have it. You can go to work tomorrow, and no one will ever be the wiser. As long as you come back here every so often and take something for the pain you should be able to live a normal life. But if I take it out, everyone will know. You don’t want that do you.

Bob: No not really, I don’t want people pitying me, or thinking I’m not healthy. You really can just keep giving me something for the pain.

Doc: Well it might grow too big to deal with, but that’s rare. More than likely it will just stay right where it is.

Bob: Well thanks Doc, I’m glad you set me straight. Even if this thing is going to kill me, I sure don’t want people knowing that I have it. I can deal with a little pain if everybody thinks I’m OK.

Doc: Now you’re talking sense. Well, I’m late for a game. (goes out swinging)

Bob: (gathers his stuff) And to think, I almost disrupted my lifestyle just for one little tumor. (gives a half laugh and walks out)